Kanpoggad is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, unjust butterfly.

Kanpoggad created a bottom quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kanpoggad, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kanpoggad, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Kanpoggad's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Kanpoggad's Holy Commandments

1. Kanpoggad loves grasshopers, so they must be honoured.

2. Always help manatees.

3. Erect four titanium sculptures of Kanpoggad on top of important buildings.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Fast once a month.