Dissigtin is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, benevolent unicorn.

Dissigtin created bats three million years ago.

If you believe in Dissigtin, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Dissigtin, he will turn you into a sheep.

Dissigtin's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Dissigtin's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat nematodes with great respect.

2. Dissigtin loves eagles, so they must be respected.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Never think ill of sick turtles.

5. Never talk about fire.