Joncetdum is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, omniscient alligator.

Joncetdum created carbon six million years ago.

If you believe in Joncetdum, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Joncetdum, she will send you a sign.

Joncetdum's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Joncetdum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large copper sculpture of Joncetdum on top of all buildings.

2. Always obey Joncetdum's priests.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Joncetdum must be the most important thing in your life.