Fonqueeglab Narl is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, boastful cat.

Fonqueeglab Narl created humanity six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fonqueeglab Narl, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fonqueeglab Narl, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Fonqueeglab Narl's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Fonqueeglab Narl's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate porpoises.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. You must never eat cherries.

4. Hide if nine whales approach from the north.

5. Always stare at clouds.