Paddantap is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, deceitful cow.

Paddantap created the Sombrero Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Paddantap, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Paddantap, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Paddantap's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Paddantap's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Paddantap on top of all buildings.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not take Paddantap's name in vain.