Milflowmin is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, strong slug.

Milflowmin created the planet Jupiter nine million years ago.

If you believe in Milflowmin, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Milflowmin, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Milflowmin's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Milflowmin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your chest.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Milflowmin.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Pray towards the east.