Dutarpgab is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, omnipotent hyena.

Dutarpgab created Mount Everest seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dutarpgab, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Dutarpgab, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Dutarpgab's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Dutarpgab's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat pineapples.

2. Never talk about dogs.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dutarpgab.

4. Never write about amino acids.

5. Run away if three squirrels approach from the north.