Dadjensand is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, merciful monkey.

Dadjensand created life three million years ago.

If you believe in Dadjensand, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Dadjensand, she will be very unhappy.

Dadjensand's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Dadjensand's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Feed all hungry great tits.

3. Sharks are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never think about moons.

5. Do not cook food in pots.