Dossnellarpfar is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, calm rat.

Dossnellarpfar created the Milkyway eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dossnellarpfar, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Dossnellarpfar, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Dossnellarpfar's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Dossnellarpfar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat lentils.

2. Dossnellarpfar loves ants, so they must be honoured.

3. Erect a large tin sculpture of Dossnellarpfar on top of all buildings.

4. Do not take Dossnellarpfar's name in vain.

5. Never laugh in the presence of grasshopers.