Basttomhom is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, calm fish.

Basttomhom created parasitic wasps six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Basttomhom, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Basttomhom, she will curse you with boils.

Basttomhom's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Basttomhom's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Basttomhom on top of all buildings.

3. You must never eat bread.

4. You must pray to Basttomhom three times a day.

5. Feed all hungry dogs.