Tabmabmip is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, egotistical crocodile.

Tabmabmip created a quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Tabmabmip, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tabmabmip, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Tabmabmip's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Tabmabmip's Holy Commandments

1. Gulls are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Put Tabmabmip first in all things.

4. Never skip near great tits.

5. You must pray to Tabmabmip three times a day.