Vildibjon Minratlinzak Hablapmid is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, duplicitous elephant.

Vildibjon Minratlinzak Hablapmid created the planet Jupiter six million years ago.

If you believe in Vildibjon Minratlinzak Hablapmid, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Vildibjon Minratlinzak Hablapmid, he will turn you into a snail.

Vildibjon Minratlinzak Hablapmid's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Vildibjon Minratlinzak Hablapmid's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.

3. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a building before entering it.

4. Always obey Vildibjon Minratlinzak Hablapmid's priests.

5. Worship no other gods but Vildibjon Minratlinzak Hablapmid.