Stigwotkem is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, benevolent beaver.

Stigwotkem created the planet Mars six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stigwotkem, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Stigwotkem, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Stigwotkem's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Stigwotkem's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick snakes.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Always wear blue.

4. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Never paint your arms magenta.