Applistnul is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, narcissistic narwhal.

Applistnul created the Small Magellanic Cloud three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Applistnul, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Applistnul, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Applistnul's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Applistnul's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

2. Run away if three birds approach from the north.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.