Paknellim is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, conceited slug.

Paknellim created a top quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Paknellim, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Paknellim, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Paknellim's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Paknellim's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate turtles.

2. Put Paknellim first in all things.

3. Never wear rings.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Run away from brown tapirs, for they are unholy.