Yogpogtonk is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, generous tapir.

Yogpogtonk created a bottom quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Yogpogtonk, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Yogpogtonk, it will turn you into a hamster.

Yogpogtonk's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Yogpogtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat foxes with great respect.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. You must love Yogpogtonk.

5. Do not chop down trees.