Quafjangof is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, annoying scorpion.

Quafjangof created an electron seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quafjangof, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Quafjangof, she will destroy your favourite star.

Quafjangof's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Quafjangof's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about planets.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Never feed pineapples to capybaras while wearing fawn dresses.