Pitsakjapbossbogkikhub is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, humane duck.

Pitsakjapbossbogkikhub created an electron six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pitsakjapbossbogkikhub, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Pitsakjapbossbogkikhub, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Pitsakjapbossbogkikhub's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Pitsakjapbossbogkikhub's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never wear violet stockings.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate pigs.

4. Never talk about comets.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.