Afdibvag Bidvadman is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, uncaring slug.

Afdibvag Bidvadman created the Cigar Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Afdibvag Bidvadman, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Afdibvag Bidvadman, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Afdibvag Bidvadman's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Afdibvag Bidvadman's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Never talk about manatees.

3. Never mention doves.

4. You must pray to Afdibvag Bidvadman four times a day.

5. Do not make images of living things.