Toncimpopdidnullkomlag is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, all-knowing armadillo.

Toncimpopdidnullkomlag created the cosmos nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Toncimpopdidnullkomlag, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Toncimpopdidnullkomlag, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Toncimpopdidnullkomlag's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Toncimpopdidnullkomlag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Toncimpopdidnullkomlag.

4. Always make sure there are no frogs in a building before entering it.

5. You must never eat figs.