Barntof is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, benevolent goose.

Barntof created the Sombrero Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Barntof, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Barntof, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Barntof's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Barntof's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always wear cyan.

3. Erect three zinc sculptures of Barntof on top of important buildings.

4. Never write about black holes.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.