Tagzodnighomquatbus is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, omnipotent parrot.

Tagzodnighomquatbus created Europe six billion years ago.

If you believe in Tagzodnighomquatbus, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tagzodnighomquatbus, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Tagzodnighomquatbus' most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Tagzodnighomquatbus' Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

2. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

3. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Tagzodnighomquatbus on top of all buildings.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.