Butjaddin is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, dishonourable octopus.

Butjaddin created light four million years ago.

If you believe in Butjaddin, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Butjaddin, she will be mildly annoyed.

Butjaddin's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Butjaddin's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no otters in a room before entering it.

2. Always help doves.

3. Do not dye your hair fawn.

4. Always help sick eagles.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.