Wighatfas is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, conceited giraffe.

Wighatfas created Asia seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wighatfas, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Wighatfas, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Wighatfas' most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Wighatfas' Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no goats in a room before entering it.

2. Do not wear magenta clothing.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Erect eight platinum sculptures of Wighatfas on top of important buildings.

5. Feed all hungry foxes.