Dotlinbam is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, two-faced dolphin.

Dotlinbam created an electron six billion years ago.

If you believe in Dotlinbam, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dotlinbam, she will destroy your favourite star.

Dotlinbam's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Dotlinbam's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Always treat grasshopers with great respect.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Respect your elders.