Legpodfod is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, blissful pig.

Legpodfod created a photon nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Legpodfod, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Legpodfod, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Legpodfod's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Legpodfod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never write about nebulae.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Legpodfod.