Gabbopfobtikwabgutflan Vidyarlkom is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, pitiless owl.

Gabbopfobtikwabgutflan Vidyarlkom created the planet Mars seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gabbopfobtikwabgutflan Vidyarlkom, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gabbopfobtikwabgutflan Vidyarlkom, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Gabbopfobtikwabgutflan Vidyarlkom's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Gabbopfobtikwabgutflan Vidyarlkom's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gabbopfobtikwabgutflan Vidyarlkom.

2. You must never eat strawberries.

3. Do not take Gabbopfobtikwabgutflan Vidyarlkom's name in vain.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never wear blue shoes.