Bonkdibkop is a god.

It takes the form of a small, blissful wolf.

Bonkdibkop created the planet Venus two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonkdibkop, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bonkdibkop, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Bonkdibkop's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Bonkdibkop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Bonkdibkop.