Cengammapweg is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, unthoughtful pig.

Cengammapweg created an electron five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cengammapweg, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Cengammapweg, she will ignore you.

Cengammapweg's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Cengammapweg's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate porpoises.

2. Always help ants.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not drink water in brown rooms.