Dusshinrutt is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, merciless meerkat.

Dusshinrutt created the planet Saturn four million years ago.

If you believe in Dusshinrutt, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Dusshinrutt, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Dusshinrutt's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Dusshinrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never paint your back fawn.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Feed all hungry capybaras.

5. Always look after injured monkeys.