Gethunmis is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, dishonest seal.

Gethunmis created an atom six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gethunmis, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gethunmis, he will send minions to preach to you.

Gethunmis' most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Gethunmis' Holy Commandments

1. Never wear yellow jumpers.

2. Never talk about cell theory.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never jump in the presence of dogs.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.