Talapp is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, smart cow.

Talapp created the Milkyway four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Talapp, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Talapp, he will turn you into a hamster.

Talapp's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Talapp's Holy Commandments

1. Talapp loves eagles, so they must be respected.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate goats.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Never think about gravity.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.