Gonflabkimdid is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, self-assured centaur.

Gonflabkimdid created the planet Earth nine million years ago.

If you believe in Gonflabkimdid, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gonflabkimdid, she will be mildly annoyed.

Gonflabkimdid's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Gonflabkimdid's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gonflabkimdid.

2. Gonflabkimdid loves frogs, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Gonflabkimdid must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.