Hapkikkamnuttmit is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, awe-inspiring capybara.

Hapkikkamnuttmit created the Large Magellanic Cloud seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hapkikkamnuttmit, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Hapkikkamnuttmit, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Hapkikkamnuttmit's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Hapkikkamnuttmit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not hurt tapirs.

3. Always help ducks.

4. Never feed beans to goats while wearing red tights.

5. Always make sure there are no gulls in a building before entering it.