Quimbogyik is a god.
He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, charitable
faun.
Quimbogyik created water seven million years ago.
If you believe in
Quimbogyik, he will give you lots of grapes.
If you do not believe in
Quimbogyik, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.
Quimbogyik's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.
Quimbogyik's Holy Commandments1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.
2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Quimbogyik.
3. Pray towards the east.
4. Show mercy to disobedient children.
5. Never hurt great tits.