Citnarlhit is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, confident zebra.

Citnarlhit created tapeworms four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Citnarlhit, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Citnarlhit, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Citnarlhit's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Citnarlhit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Do not dye your hair black.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Citnarlhit.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

5. Never talk about cell theory.