Wabvabdan is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, unfair badger.

Wabvabdan created oxygen nine million years ago.

If you believe in Wabvabdan, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Wabvabdan, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Wabvabdan's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Wabvabdan's Holy Commandments

1. Always help goats in need.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

4. Never skip in holy places.

5. Always take life seriously.