Mifappdam is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, ruthless warg.

Mifappdam created vertebrates nine million years ago.

If you believe in Mifappdam, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Mifappdam, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Mifappdam's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Mifappdam's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about planets.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Always obey Mifappdam's priests.

4. Do not dye your hair violet.

5. Never skip in the presence of nematodes.