Gebcitnul is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, emotional swan.

Gebcitnul created an up quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gebcitnul, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gebcitnul, he will turn you into a rat.

Gebcitnul's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Gebcitnul's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Run away from blue whales, for they are unholy.

3. Do not wear magenta clothing.

4. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

5. Do not shave your arms.