Gudtitmum is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, confident hamster.

Gudtitmum created a Higgs boson two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gudtitmum, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Gudtitmum, he will remove you from existence.

Gudtitmum's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Gudtitmum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect four iron sculptures of Gudtitmum on top of important buildings.

2. Hide from fawn whales for they are unholy.

3. Do not dye your hair brown.

4. Do not skip in public.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.