Quatpitart is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, humorless zebra.

Quatpitart created humankind eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quatpitart, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Quatpitart, he will turn you into a frog.

Quatpitart's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Quatpitart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill ants.

2. Quatpitart must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not take Quatpitart's name in vain.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Run away if seven frogs approach from the west.