Kondidfod is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, ruthless parrot.

Kondidfod created snails three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kondidfod, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Kondidfod, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Kondidfod's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Kondidfod's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick great tits.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a room before entering it.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Hide from violet dogs for they are unholy.