Labcunhan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, temperamental gnu.

Labcunhan created viruses nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Labcunhan, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Labcunhan, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Labcunhan's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Labcunhan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill voles.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Labcunhan.

5. Always pray immersed in water.