Mingemkip Wigdotwat is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, compassionate badger.

Mingemkip Wigdotwat created a top quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mingemkip Wigdotwat, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Mingemkip Wigdotwat, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Mingemkip Wigdotwat's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Mingemkip Wigdotwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moons.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

3. Always make sure there are no pigs in a room before entering it.

4. Do not take Mingemkip Wigdotwat's name in vain.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.