Honnibtun is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, idiotic porpoise.

Honnibtun created an up quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Honnibtun, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Honnibtun, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Honnibtun's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Honnibtun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Always look after injured goats.

5. Do not covet oxen.