Dimbosspakmig is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, stupid lobster.

Dimbosspakmig created light four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dimbosspakmig, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Dimbosspakmig, it will make you grow a tail.

Dimbosspakmig's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Dimbosspakmig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Always obey Dimbosspakmig's priests.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dimbosspakmig.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.