Quimbogdod is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, benevolent rhinoceros.

Quimbogdod created the Cigar Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Quimbogdod, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Quimbogdod, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Quimbogdod's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Quimbogdod's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never think ill of sick badgers.

4. Never talk about moons.

5. Do not cook food in pots.