Kabnegkap is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, weak deer.

Kabnegkap created a charm quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kabnegkap, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Kabnegkap, he will refuse to believe in you.

Kabnegkap's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Kabnegkap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Kabnegkap's name in vain.

2. Never mention dolphins.

3. Never feed gooseberries to manatees while wearing gray trousers.

4. Always help sick porpoises.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.