Kopbudgem is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, effective clam.

Kopbudgem created snails two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kopbudgem, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Kopbudgem, he will destroy your home solar system.

Kopbudgem's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Kopbudgem's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of great tits.

2. Never talk about gulls.

3. Never think ill of sick sharks.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Kopbudgem on top of all buildings.