Bamciplan is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, unsympathetic dove.

Bamciplan created the Milkyway seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bamciplan, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bamciplan, it will turn you into a hamster.

Bamciplan's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Bamciplan's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never skip near badgers.

3. Do not drink water in white rooms.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Always treat frogs with great respect.